Top 5 Reasons Megan Fox will Rule the World

Megan Fox frequently schlepps around with her man, Brian Austin Green. I personally think any dude who is so pretentious he has to have 3 names in not worthy of my goddess Megan. She sometimes can look a little nextdoorish with a baseball cap and some grungies on while running out for coffee. But trust me, she just pulled her lingerie off and deflated her boobs and just a few minutes before she looked hot enough to scorch concrete. She has to tone it down a little bit when she runs out in public or else people have wrecks and stuff. Let’s cover why exactly I think she will one day rule the world:
1) She knows how to handle a gun
Megan likes to pick movies that, well, pay her. She probably won’t get nominated for any Oscar’s or anything anytime soon. Through no fault of her own of course, just because they can’t make a movie big enough for my girl. She typically ends up in action movies, where she punches guys in the nose and shoots at robots. Everybody respects women who have good aim. This is important.
2) Those boobies
Yep, I noticed them. You did too. Ever watch her running in that transformers movie where she’s trying to get away from some evil robot and she happens to be wearing a tanktop and the sun is glistening off of her heaving, bouncing breasts? I have it playing on a loop on my desktop. I can’t go to sleep during naptime without watching it. Just the right size, yum.
3) She knows she’s hot
This self-confidence will help her get votes in the presidential election, and help her conquer enemies who fly spy planes over here trying to photography her in a bikini.
4) She is Irish, French, and Native-American
A couple of those tend towards wookie-bush syndrome, but in her case, she shaves that beav bald so no worries. But that combination is exotic and makes me daydream.
5) She can shoot lasers out of her eyes
Not unlike Melissa Archer, those blue eyes are fierce. She flashes them around, and guys all over the world fall under a spell in which they pull out their wallets and drop them at her feet. Look at em. Blue. Icy. Wonderful.