Charlotte McKinney Gives us the Gift of Her Boobs

I kinda had to post this. After the breathtaking post from last month
Charlotte McKinney’s Boobs Bounce Free
it’s fair to say I’m on hyper-alert for Ms Mckinney’s boobies.

She certainly has a gift with those things. They will stop some traffic when she’s hailing a cab, fo sho. And she is also generous enough to give them as a gift. I like how she is naughty and always flashing them around.

I was on her instagram account the other day doing my creeper thing where I try to burn holes in the screen by looking at every square inch of her body while singing voodoo songs geared towards making her fall in love with me. There was this photo of her getting out of the shower, sort-of wrapped up in a towel. Her cleavage was wet, and quite bare. I say “sort of” because it was kind of a little towel, and she is kind of a big girl, and it was doing an awful job of covering up her woman lumps.

Suffice it to say my eyes rolled back into my head and I did this heavy panting thing for like ten minutes. Ok, alright, you caught me, it really only took two minutes. But you know what I mean.

Scour her insta all you want, you won’t find that photo. Apparently it came close to breaking the internet, and she deleted it. I wish to hell I had saved it, alongside the other 1.3 GB of Charlotte photos I have stuffed into my hard drive. Anyway, I’m kind of glad she deleted it, because I don’t want to share such and slurpalicious intimate photo with the masses. I’m sure it was only meant for me… sigh.

Eventually I will get around to posting some ass shots of Charlotte too. I know bralessblog is geared more towards the upper half, but dang this girl gets me revved up.

Charlotte McKinney cleavageCharlotte McKinney boob adjust

Posted in Braless Celebrities | Leave a comment

Sports Pokies Madness

Sports Pokies have long been a staple here on BralessBlog.

The way you folks clamor for more and devour every sporty girl morsel I give you speaks to the popularity.

Why is that? Well, I have some theories. Mainly because I’m absurdly smart and an under-utilized national resource.

When you are looking at a model, you know she got paid to show whatever she’s got. When you look at an amateur, there’s a little bit of a thrill in seeing something you’re probably not supposed to be seeing.

Along those same lines, many of these chicks we see bouncing around on TV are there for the sports, and not really to look good or be ogled. Well, except for beach volleyball girls. Holy shit, what is up with their outfits? I’m surprised there aren’t mass riots, perverts clawing each other’s eyes out trying to get to the partially clothed, sandy hotties.

It’s a primal thing. Yes, I’m back to the primal argument, like from the downblouse discussion. You see those sports pokies and you go mad, you can barely control the horny caveman inside you.

Some scenes are a little more rare than others. As an example, tennis pokies are plentiful. A solid 50% or more of tennis players are female. These girls get out there in skimpy outfits and play their asses off, getting sweaty and sticky. It’s not surprising that we get a view of some pokies on a not-infrequent basis.

But compare that to say Judo pokies. You are never gonna see any judo nips, fuhgetaboutit. They are all wrapped up in a gi, they don’t wrestle around on the mat long enough to get sweaty, etc.

Let’s so what my brilliant mind can think of:

  • Tennis pokies
  • Swimming pokies
  • Gymnastics pokies
  • Cheerleader pokies
  • Volleyball pokies
  • Track and field pokies
  • Runner pokies

One could argue that running may be a subset of track & field, but a) don’t argue with me, I’m the boss, and b) it’s in a different location and mostly a different subset of women.

I’ll be honest, 90% of that’s just an edited list of summer olympic sports. I took any off the list that I didn’t think would generate some pokie action. And I added cheerleaders. Because: cheerleaders.

We should do the same for winter olympics:

  • Figure skating pokies
  • Speed skating pokies
  • Luge pokies

Okay, I admit that I’m stretching it with luge, but those chicks are laying down and some of ’em are hot. You cannot blame me for trying.
So I sort of wonder if my magnificence can churn out examples of each of these sports? It seems unlikely, because my pervert-OCD will kick in long before I finish the list.

Swimmer Pokies

Posted in Random Braless Nonsense | Leave a comment

Nipple Jewelry Pokies

It is time to cover something that we have never covered before here on BralessBlog. And yes, I understand the irony of phrasing it this way considering we have the duty of “covering” breasts covered by a tiny bit of clothing but not covered by bras.

That topic would be nipple jewelry, aka piercings. And more precisely: nipple jewelry pokies.

Yes, these would be a tiny subset of pokies visible to the naked eye with piercings evident.

I realize I’m an old curmudgeon, and grumpy, and smell a little like pee, but disregard all that. I just don’t like pierced nipples. Shitfire, I honestly don’t like anything pierced. All that crapola gets in the way. Instead of ranting and raving about piercings in general, I’ll try to confine it to just nips.

I like nipples. A whole lot. I like ’em big and small. I like the silver dollars and the hershey kisses. I like ’em pink and brown and every shade inbetween. But stick a damn bar through them, and it throws me off. Now don’t get me wrong, a piercing doesn’t automatically make my willy go limp. It just does nothing for me, and can distract me.

I guess piercings tend to make and keep nipples hard. This is total speculation, I have no idea if this is true or not. Along those lines, I guess a nipple aggravated by nipple jewelry might be erect more often, and therefore visible more often, in the way of braless pokies. But still, it’s like cheating, and I don’t like it.

I’m pretty much just including coverage of this topic on the vaunted blog because I’ve been repeatedly asked to show some photos. You know, but all the fans. The guys, and gals, who are typing me long messages with one hand while the other hand is ahhh, ummm, massaging their sore muscle.

nipple jewelry pokies 1nipple jewelry pokies 2nipple jewelry pokies 3nipple jewelry pokies 4

I don’t think Alyssa has nipple jewelry, but if you enjoy witty banter you will probably want to read this
http://www.bralessblog.com/2012/07/13/alyssa-milano-shops-for-a-bra.html

And if you don’t enjoy witty banter, but kinda have a thing for 70’s nightclub colors and would consider wearing an orange-ish swatch cut from a dirty rug, you can go here
http://www.bralessblog.com/2011/05/28/jennifer-love-hewitt-a-nutcase.html

Posted in Amateur Pokies | Leave a comment

Carla Gugino Pokies

I started to type up a big long post about how I’m not sure exactly what size Carla Gugino’s boobs are, but that she looks a whole lot like Rachel Weisz. Then I realized I did the exact same thing back in 2012.

The good news is: I’m consistently aroused by Carla’s boobies. And also, she reminds me of Rachel Weisz regardless of which day you catch me.

The bad news is: I’m getting (more) senile.

I actually saw Carla in Night at the Museum and I thought to myself a) great rack, b) I like boobies. She is 45 years old these days, which is hard to believe. Not much sag there, that’s fo sure. And not very wrinkly in the face, good living that gal. She isn’t married, and has commented that she likes the boyfriend/girlfriend thing too much to get married. That tells me she like-a the sauce. If you haven’t seen that episode of Saturday Night Live, well just keep staring at Carla’s cans and don’t worry about it.

I checked out some of her nude scenes (link below) and I have some observations for you. First of all, her boobs are as big bare as they are plumped up by a bra. Dang, delicious. Also, I saw a scene where she was getting out of the bathtub nude, and her butt was all shiny and wet, and I will surprise myself by saying her butt is as hot as her boobs.

She gets down and dirty, with several clips of her hunching on dudes. And there are several scenes of Carla running around with her boobs jiggling. Mercy, that body is made for me to drool over. She has pretty eyes too. I think I’m gonna give her four starts gents. Every time she comes out with a new movie, which is pretty frequently, she does the whole talk show and interview circuit. For a 45 year old, she doesn’t mind strutting around in some tight, braless dresses. Awesome.

Carla Gugino bralessCarla Gugino pokiesCarla Gugino boobscarla gugino cleavagecarla gugino cleavage 2

carla gugino handbra

???????????????

Posted in Celebrity Pokies | Leave a comment